Tuesday, May 24, 2016
Mini Update: The end of Merc Ret, the ebb of my depression?
I apologize for pretty much falling off the face of the earth since my last update. It's been fairly silent on the wire across all of my social media, including Tumblr and Patreon. I do have a history of disappearing from the interwebs when Mercury goes into retrograde. Of course, beliefs may vary; I initially had very little interest or belief in astrology until Merc ret lined up so well with so many catastrophes. If Merc ret gives me peace of mind, true or not true, so be it.
That being said, when I last updated, I noted very briefly that I was diagnosed with severe major depression. Unbeknownst to me, my listlessness, exhaustion and general lack of will to do anything were symptoms of an ongoing condition likely triggered by feeling homeless and unable to control my life - a bit ironically when one of my circlemates stated that I'm probably the most adult of our circle. If I'm the most adult, god help us. But it illustrates that this feeling has likely been mostly in my head this entire time.
I'm happy to announce that the medication I was put on has been helping me immensely. It's also doing a much better job than my previous medication of managing my anxiety. I'm pretty darn ecstatic. I've felt incredibly calm and in control for the past couple of weeks. I've also been more apt to let my solid-steel wall down around my circle and let them know when shit has hit-eth the fan-eth instead of playing "Glorious Leader" (my so-dubbed nickname) and maintaining an in-control facade. Their support has made this transition back to the me I remember well in 2008 and 2009 much easier.
I'm not going to update on circle, home or familiar matters with this. That'll come at the beginning of next month like usual. I just wanted to let you know that my silence doesn't mean things aren't going well. It just means that it's been a transition and has taken some getting used to.
Please bear with me and give me a bit more time to adjust. We'll return to your regularly scheduled program shortly!